CHOICE VIEWERS' WIVES VOLUME 59
DVD. Your Choice
already reviewed Volume 60
is this long running series, but thanks to life’s little
idiosyncrasies, Volume 59 has just been sent
over. Not that it really matter which order you see these DVDs
in of course – it’s not like they have a continuing
story or anything.
As with other volumes, this is very much a mixed bag. You might
find yourself wondering why Your Choice are not operating some
sort of quality cut-off with certain clips, but that’s probably
missing the point. This series sells on the basis of reality after
all, and in the real world not everyone is a sexy porn starlet.
Each VW collection I’ve seen follows the
same pattern – moving from solo girl scenes to girl-girl
and finally full hardcore with men and women. Unusually, the opening
scene of Volume 59 proves to be the highlight
of the disc. Evey is a cute blonde who strips out of denim before
fingering herself and enjoying a purple vibrator. It’s efficiently
shot and she’s cuter than many a porno professional.
Sammie offers another solo scene, let down by bad lighting that
renders the clip a bit grainy, and her unfortunate ability to
make her ‘sexy’ pouting look more like yawning. Nicola
and jade and a couple of chivvy women with ridiculous false eyelashes,
pussy stubble and stretch marks, and neither of them are remotely
Kelly and Axa’s scene sets up a scenario – one girl
surprising another mid-wank and joining in (okay, I didn’t
say it was a good scenario!). They share assorted toys
and one stuffs a couple of pairs of knickers inside herself for
no immediately obvious reason.
MILF hunters will be pleased with Kate, a middle aged woman who
gives birthday boy Kirk a present he won’t forget in a hurry,
while the next clip sees chubby Hannah playing with herself in
a hotel room before Dean appears out of nowhere to join in. She’s
quite cute but the scene itself is pretty average.
readers concerned about public hair shaving will be glad to see
that Claudia eschews such trends. This mature woman is quite the
hairiest I’ve seen in some time, and no doubt there are
some of you who find such things erotic. If so, you’ll enjoy
her coupling with Woody.
Shelly and Paul get together in what looks unfortunately like
a crack house – quite the most run-down, grubby looking
locale I’ve seen outside of films made in warehouses. Sadly,
the couple are no more appealing than their bedroom. Mae and Matt
offer a step up – she’s cute and nervous, he’s
dorky and hesitant. In fact, they are so unsure of themselves
that you start to wonder if this is the first time either have
had sex – but they do a decent job.
The £1000 bonus is again split in this volume, though I’ll
be damned if I can see why. Kim, Roxy and Tony are two rather
ropey old birds and a bored black man, while a fat old white dude
– unidentified – also joins in. It’s pretty
horrible. Meanwhile, Sophie – wearing a sort of school uniform
and rubber thigh boots – takes on Geoff and Miles in the
other clip, notable mainly for the relentless running commentary
from the Lahndan Geezer holding the camera (watching these collections
suggests that South London is awash with amateur pornographers).
It’s passable stuff, but not my choice of the best part
of the collection.
So, a typical pick ‘n’ mix selection. Not the best
VW collection I’ve seen by any means –
but there is something for (almost) everyone, and it’s probable
that lots of people will love the bits that did nothing for me.
It all feels genuinely amateur though, and that’s certainly
reviews: Your Choice Viewers' Wives 60
Choice Viewers' Wives 61