SAID FRED - STOP THE WORLD
admit that, as an old git who will happily dance to Right Said
Fred's I'm Too Sexy in a knowingly post-ironic
way at parties, but whose taste generally includes almost any
music as long as it's good, I approached this one with a mix of
hope and fear. I hoped that I would be able to say something like
"although this isn't really to my taste, people who like
good, smart, witty pop music will probably like this." I
even had a faint hope that this might be that rare thing, pop
music that I like (see: Madonna, Lady Gaga, and Shakira). I hoped
that at worst I might be able to say it was so bad that it was
actually quite good.
I feared that it might be dire pop pap from start to finish though.
Sadly my fear was correct. In the interests of getting a few more
opinions, I tried playing it to friends and family. The politest
things any of them said were "next track, please"
and "this one [track 9, Happily Ever After]
has a nice, Latin beat to it; it's the least offensive so far,
but it's very repetitive; oh... next track, please."
It's as though some reasonably competent but utterly uninspired
computer programmers had decided to work with some reasonably
competent but utterly uninspired singers, with a a working brief
of crafting a kind of middle-of-the-road tribute to the naffest
pop music of the past three decades, and then the finished project
had been painstakingly drained of all traces of life, energy,
inspiration, or fun by a producer whose idea of a good weekend
is cleaning his Volvo and watching the EastEnders omnibus.